What does April mean for you?

Happy April Hive Fam!

Well Wishes for a New Month!

What does April mean to you?

What does April represent for you?

What would you like it to represent for you?

For me, April is National Poetry Month, so that’s something I’d spend a little bit more time than usual focused on and celebrating. Also, thinking about the season of April…”April’s” Latin origin means “to open.”

And when we think of spring of course, this means to blossom. The flowers, the trees —blossoming.

So a theme that I would like to encourage for us this month is to be open. To the good and the beautiful. To whatever you want to be open to.

Open to the things that would make us bloom, that would make us blossom.

What does that look like for you? 

 It could look like trying new things on your self-discovery journey.

Trying new things in your journey of self-love and self-care or even trying new things in selflessness.

How might you bloom this month?

Don’t be afraid to stretch just a little. Because that’s what you need to do to open, right?

When trees and plants bloom and open they appear to stretch their leaves and petals.

That doesn’t mean to overly stretch though, just enough to feel the release.

The release of something good to the world that you brought.

Cheers to blooming this month 🍯 

- Coach Honey

May 21st Are You Ready?

May 21st Save the Date!

"Reflections" a virtual event

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/reflections-series-with-life-coach-honey-tickets-318551846147

In this series, participants discuss their experiences and goals related to their self-discovery journey. In this event, you have the opportunity to also participate in a coaching experience with a certified life coach. Join me!

Popular Focuses in this Series

Connecting with The Self

Tuning into Purpose| Increasing Self-Awareness | Passion Discovery

Connecting with Others

Improving Relationships | Dating | Navigating a Break Up

Connecting with The World

Finding/Pursuing a New Career | Acclimating to College Life |Community Involvement

Quotes of the Month:

“Accountability is not consequences, but ownership. It is a character trait, a life stance, a willingness to own your actions and results regardless of the circumstances.” – Brian P. Moran

“As long as we are not ourselves, we will try to be what other people are.” – Malidoma Patrice Somé

#lifecoachhoney #onlinecoaching #virtualevent

Heyy April

Heyy April!

 

Have you set your intentions for April?  We are entering the second quarter of the year.  How did Q1 go?

 

It is so easy to get lost in time if you solely focus on vague long-term goals and set them too far out. 

For my fellow multi-passionate individuals, I recommend seasonal goal-setting.

Personally, I am most effective when I pay close attention to goals that are in shorter increments like 30 to 90 days.  It becomes easier to set biweekly goals and meet milestones with mini rewards along the way.  It then becomes easier to tweak daily or weekly habits for each focus,

 

What are your goals for this quarter?

 

- Coach Honey

Thank You Listeners

Knocking on the door of our 7th milestone for podcast downloads and I want to offer you seven thank-yous.

Wow, you're awesome.🙏🏾

If you have not already, check out the Water for Your Mind Podcast on all podcast streaming sites.

Promise not to talk your ear off.

Plus, it's like having a life coach in your pocket-- for free.

www.lifecoachhoney.com
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#lifecoach #selfhelp #selfdiscovery #selfempowerment #lifecoachhoney

Meditation for the week

Have you set your intentions for the week?

I want you to set your intention for the week. I want you to take a couple of deep breaths...yes those 4-4-6 counts. If you aren't familiar that's 4 counts breathing in, 4 counts holding your breath and 6 counts breathing out.

What will you do in this week ahead?

What will your focus be?

Whatever it is that you want to get done in this week I want you to be present through the process.

I want you to go into this week as intentional as possible and declare that it will be beautiful. 

How do you want to be this week?

I challenge you to write down 3 adjectives that describe how you want to feel and be seen in this new week.

I will share with you what I personally ask especially if I may not be in the mental state to pull from within. I will just straight up ask God what would you have me do this week? So I encourage you to do the same if you drew a blank. It will come to you.

Stay amazing...

Group Strategy, The Self and Your Role

To achieve any major goal, one MUST have a strategy.

Especially if this is a collective goal. 

Do you have a plan of purpose around the causes that you believe in?  I want to stress, believe in, here because when we believe in something we take action, right? So which causes are those and what purpose are you aiming to serve around them?

There is a certain portion of self-awareness that is crucial to be able to organize and strategize for a desired outcome.

In general, a lot of us have found ourselves running around on autopilot only to be shaken up for a period of time before we revert back to our autopilot setting.  But imagine if you listened to yourself during those shake ups.  During those periods that rock you.  What would life be like if we lived on purpose?  Meaning you consciously do what your soul calls you to do. Consistently -- on purpose.  You pay attention to your emotions and the thoughts that cause them.  You pay attention to the stimuli that demands a change. 

This is everso cliché but it truly does start with you.  Many people feel like, if they are not the problem then it is not their responsibility to change.  I get that.  So where then should your focus be to attain a desired outcome? 

My clients know that I don’t believe in talking in circles or arguing in circles.  That is not my frequency or one that I allow them to stay on especially within relationships and absolutely not with strangers.  But we do believe in honoring our feelings and values with others that value them, starting with ourselves and taking calculated action to get where we want to be.  But again, you must have strategy.

When you have taken the time to get to know yourself you learn what your role is in all of this.  What is your role in the zeitgeist? 

I challenge you to draft a spectrum of your role from the smallest scale in your day to day living to larger scales among those that share your purpose, to the largest scale, giving back to the creator the gifts that have infinitely fell upon you.

 If you have not meditated in a while, I challenge you to take 5 minutes to quiet yourself and sit with this question.  You might surprise yourself with what you come up with.  Whatever thoughts come to mind, write them down.  Examine them.  They ask yourself, why? 

Everyone is not expected to do 12 different jobs.  Even if you have the ability to do that, ask yourself if you are doing what actually matters to you. 

No, it’s not selfish because what matters to you will matter to an abundance of other people in this world if you search for them. 

Or maybe just one other person. 

There is beauty in being a part of something bigger than yourself and that only needs to begin with one other person.

I am a multi-passionate soul and I completely understand those that are led in different directions seemingly in multiple lanes.  I still actually consider that being in “your lane” if you are focused on exactly what you want to accomplish and take time periods to do that strategically.  I also completely understand those that know their one role.  That role is important and should not be taken lightly.  Find the spaces that you are needed in.   

What is the best use of your time in this life?  Whatever it is you choose to do make sure that you are proud of it.  You.  Yourself.  Your soul.  That’s what you live for. 

Our soul is our breath given to us by God.  It is our internal compass that directs us. 

Cherish the gift.

Coach Honey

Appreciate You

So real question for you…

When’s the last time you did a dopeness inventory?

Like when is the last time you sat and reviewed the reasons why you are dope?

What are the things about yourself that you like the most?

I challenge you to pause, take 3 minutes and draft a list. 

Title it “(Your Name) Dopeness Inventory”

Am I serious?

Yes! 

Look, I’ll event start you of with one.

1)     I am dope because I take active efforts in personal development

*poetry snaps*

Continue on…

I’ll be here when you’re done with it, K? Go!

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*insert hold music*

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Hopefully you really paused and you now have a list in front of you that brings a sense of joy.  A healthy sense of pride.

Next question is, what can you appreciate more about yourself? 

Hm?

Would you say that you are doing the best you can in your studies?

your friendships?

your family life?

at work?

the community?

your looove life?

There is some place in your life that you are putting in WORK so I want you to take the time to acknowledge that today, right now. 

There will always be room for improvement in some areas that we may be borderline ashamed about (which we can work on later) but today we focus on why we are dope.

It is important to be able to appreciate yourself not just for you but for those around you that you care about.   

When you appreciate yourself you are kinder to yourself.  You hold yourself accountable not in an authoritative way, but, like a loving guardian. 

When you appreciate yourself you actually create fuel to reach heights that you might not have imagined for yourself.

It is so important and very powerful…

Even when we fail to receive appreciation outside of ourselves… matter of fact!  Especially when we fail to receive appreciation from people we care about sometimes, we still have the appreciation that we carry for ourselves.

It matters.  Please do not dismiss it.    

We have a higher power that we appreciate and appreciates us by the gift of purpose beating in our chest. 

How does that make you feel?  You are so special that you are here today, existing, continuously becoming the best version of yourself… taking measures like listening to podcasts that water your mind.  

Cheers to you friend.

Coach Honey

What Just Happened?

Were you ever having a normal conservation with someone that you care about and they flipped out on you, but you had NO IDEA why? 

No matter how conscious and self-aware we intend to be, sometimes, things go completely missed by us.  If this is a naturally occurring event for you sometimes the solution could be introspection but if it’s not, this is an opportunity to assess the situation and maybe even deepen your connection.

In general, any time someone displays a strong emotion towards you, it is worth picking apart. Disclaimer: The answer is not always as simple as, she/he was angry with me and started screaming or he/she was sad about something I did and this resulted in tears.  In episode seven, we talked about how emotions are determined by our thoughts and how each influence our actions.  So, as I always say, take the time to get curious about what your loved one is thinking.  What must be going on in their mind that produces such a strong emotion?  How would you label the emotion that was projected by them?  What did they say to you?

The purpose of this episode is to shed some light for when we get caught in these situations of missing something going on in our relationships, romantic or platonic.  We always want to be in tune.  I know not all of us care to be in tune with everyone and everything but in tune with the people we choose to have close to us, right? 

But naturally, everyday, even minute by minute in the fast-paced world we live in, we can be met with a number of distractions.  I say that word without any negative connotation.  Because a distraction is just something that draws away our attention, right?  The truth is, we have worthy causes that distract us temporarily from our relationships.  The things that we focus on.  The things that we are building and preparing for, be it for our families, our community and ourselves can sometimes consume us and our attention.  Isn’t it crazy how the things we are pursuing to give a better quality of life to our partners and ourselves can sometimes feel like a cause of strain in our relationships?  Well we run into issues when we fail to do genuine check ins on each other.

I always recommend having open communication in your relationship.  But in addition to this, make a habit of having a heart to heart check-up with your partner and reflection time for yourself.  This is not about laying down expectations for anyone but about communicating each other’s feelings on a regular basis.  Pay attention to how you act towards one another and determine if both of your behaviors serve the relationship.    

In episode one, I asked, what is your story?  So, remember that everyone is telling themselves a story about different aspects of their life, every day.  Everyone has a story about who they are and about their relationships.  Believe it or not, they are even telling themselves a story about how YOU behave in the relationship and what YOUR actions or words mean.  Now that you are embarking on your own self-discovery journey, you are becoming more and more aware of your own values allowing you to gain compassion for yourself…an understanding of yourself.  Think about how you would apply this kind of thinking outside of yourself, to your partner or friend.  Ask yourself, what could they be thinking that makes them feel so strongly in this way?  Is this emotion that surfaced one that always shows itself in the relationship and just may be magnified in this moment or could it be a compound of other feelings?  Now do NOT ask your partner this.  These are questions to ask yourself first.  These questions prepare your mind and your heart to be able to assess the circumstances with your partner/friend as a team.

As always, visit lifecoachhoney.com to submit your questions and experiences in the Ask Honey section. You can also shoot me an email at coaching@woodsdomllc.com .

I have been Coach Honey,

Peace and love  

Belief Windows and How to Begin to Get Unstuck

Peace and blessings everyone.  How are y’all feeling today? Very well I hope.  I am thankful for the purpose that beats in you. 

I want us to meditate on a concept called Belief Windows.  I first learned this term from Hyrum Smith.  It is super important to cover because especially now since we know that in order for an area of our life to change you must change the thoughts protecting the current standards and behavior. 

If this is your first time joining me, I recommend that you start with episode one of the podcast to get a sense of the language that I use so that you can follow.  So, the concept of belief windows is just as it sounds.  We take a look at our belief systems dictating what we do.  In last week’s workshop we spoke about emotions and we learned how to direct our thoughts to influence our emotions.  By the way, if you missed the coaching call event where we discussed this, be sure to sign up with your email on the homepage to stay in the loop.  

Clients and I work to identify belief windows to best aid their self-discovery journey.  It is a conscious practice that allows them to begin to be able to make lasting positive change.  The best way to examine this concept is with an example.  One common belief window that many people have held and still hold is that monetary riches equates to evilness.  Without us judging this belief, let’s jump outside of ourselves and paint a picture to understand it.  

It may be understandable why so many have this belief window especially if they did not grow up with very much.  I and so many I know were probably introduced to this belief at a very young age.  Many of us have maybe held it as our own for so long that it became unconscious.  Just like any other belief, it could have been due to what we have seen or heard around the subject.  In this case, around the effects of big money or what rich people have done.  It could have been trickled down beliefs of our environment or friends and family that we attached to as well.  Societal beliefs of what rich people represent is not usually very positive depending on which side of the gate you are on.  Richness sometimes equates to greed and deception. Stemming from the belief that most wealthy people get their money from sources that exploit or take advantage of people and who wants to be linked to those things, right?      

So, what could be some behaviors that this belief window would cause? 

The person may not desire to make a living past what is “just enough” for fear of making “too much money.” 

The person may lack financial literacy because there was no perceived need to be great at it.

The person may self-sabotage their potential and finances to further prove that this belief is correct, that they are a good person and that their finances match that.  This being subconsciously of course. 

How much effort to make money do you think would be given if someone believes that “being rich equals bad”?  It is almost as if the person would hit a metaphorical window, or threshold if you will because they do not want to be associated with “being evil.”  Even examining our relationships, someone with this belief window that is actually doing well, might hide their monetary wealth from others for fear of judgement.  I mean, doesn’t the bible say that money is the root of all evil?  Or does it say the love of money is the root of all evil, which could take on a whole new meaning?  See what happened there?  That is an example of challenging a belief.  One might also challenge this belief by proving that there are people with good character that have generated their wealth by noble means.

The overall point is that this belief window dictates major decisions.  With something that has this much power over your behavior, it is worth taking a look at to make sure that you would like to continue to hold the belief or to change it into to one that may serve you better.

Wouldn’t you like to examine your own?  I love to work with clients on this because it is a super useful tool for getting “unstuck.”   

If you have questions that you would like for me to cover on the podcast, visit lifecoachhoney.com and submit you question in the “ask honey” section.

I have been Coach Honey.

Peace

and

Love.

Emotions

Emotions are clearly my favorite thing to talk about.  Emotions and their power drive every choice we make in our lives. 

Isn’t that deep?  In case you have not noticed by now and please do not feel bad if you haven’t…Every single thing that you do in your life is because you want to experience a certain feeling and probably avoid another.  You do everything because you are aiming for a feeling. 

When I was first introduced to this, it changed THE ENTIRE GAME for me.  I began to question EVERYTHING.  Why do I have this friend?  Why am I in a relationship with this particular guy?  Why did I leave that guy?  Why did I study this in school?  Why do I live here instead of there?  Why did I color my hair blonde?  Why do I avoid people with this personality trait and why do I cling to people with that trait?  Why won’t I tell this person no? Why am I working here?

Endless questions that have fueled my own journey of self-discovery and self-knowledge.

At some point, we have been introduced to the idea that emotions are messages. 

If you have not:

Welcome, love!  Have you met Emotions?? They are messages... 

They often can let you know or reinforce what is important to you.  For example, that sense of nervousness before a presentation might let you know that you care about delivering a message.  Your states of feeling give insight into what you are thinking because your thoughts are what actually cause them. 

You may not agree with that statement right away because sometimes it feels like our emotions creep up on us without any recollection of a thought.  But that is because the thought occurs so quickly that it can bypass our self-awareness…but it does occur first. 

Proving this to yourself might take some time but the purpose of discussing this is to show you how to receive less than obvious messages from your emotions.  To practice, consider the last time a strong feeling came upon you.  Ask yourself, what happened that triggered this feeling?  What was going on in your body?  Did you feel a slight increase in temperature?  Did you feel a sense of nervousness or a tingling sensation?  Did you feel a sense of lightness or did you feel lifted in your body as if weight was taken off? 

Write down the event and what was happening inside of your body.  After giving a description, being as detailed as possible, express what was going on in your mind.  If you work in this direction, it will help you uncover the thought that perpetuated these emotions.       

So, what am I getting at today?  If you can already see how your emotions drive your choices and especially your behavior you can begin to assess the areas of your life where you are presently stuck on making a decision or an area of your life where you would like to get different results.

Always remember, we want our values to align with our living as much as possible.  Again, values are not the standards that you say are important to you because they sound good, but are the relevant themes that are important to your soul and make you feel whole. 

Listen to your states of feeling.

Peace and Love,

Coach Honey            

A Note From Me To You During COVID-19

Peace and blessings to you!  I am grateful to be able to connect with you another day on this platform.  Thank you for being a listener or a reader. 

I hope you all are staying safe and trying to take it easy if applicable.  I am SO thankful for those on the front lines during this time.  From the hospitals to the stores to the schools and everyone in between I send my prayers and my love.  Everyone trying to keep their family together or simple just yourself, my heart is with you.  We have lost so many loved ones but gained angels that we will not forget.  Keep them in your heart always and focus on your favorite memories that bring that unmatched warm feeling.

With love always,

Coach Honey